5 Habits To Improve Your Life

 I’m back in fearing-for-humanity mode. I blame Miley Cirus’ performance at the Video Music Awards (VMAs). Her lewd dance moves seem to be monopolizing our national discourse.  

These days we’ve also got a little chemical warfare going on over in Syria, but let’s talk about how it’s the VMA performance that signals the end of humanity as we know it.  

I’m in-the-know about Syria because I’ve been researching, researching for the answers to a question I posed here on the blog a few months ago:

What is the absolute bare minimum I can do to reap reasonable benefits in the following important categories?

Read on for the answers, from assorted experts.

1.                Workouts –     According to my personal trainer, whom I see once a year to revamp my strength training routine, you must:

-          Do cardio for 30 minutes 5 days a week

-          Do strength training for 30-45 minutes 2 days a week.

2.               Yoga – According to my yogini friend Ashley, if you want reasonable peace of mind, you must:

-         Do asana yoga 4 times a week, even if it’s just for 5 minutes.

-         For maximum yoga benefits you should do yoga 15 minutes in the morning and 25 minutes before bed. And maybe hit a class or two weekly.

Did I mention Ashley is one of my overachiever friends? Am pretty sure “bare minimum” is not in her vocabulary, just like “kudalini yoga” was not in my vocabulary, until I asked Ashley for some tips.

 

Ashley says classes are the best approach for beginners. Most yoga studios offer some inexpensive or free community classes so call to check. I have so much more yoga information to share that I’m gonna have to do a follow-up post on it. Look for that next week! In the meantime, asana away for 5 minutes a day.

3.               Toothbrushing – According to Julie, my favorite dental professional, you must:

-         Brush twice a day. Weird, after-lunch-brushing sessions are not required, but here’s what is: 

-         Daily flossing. Yes, daily. You must remove the plaque or else it can migrate into your bloodstream, which can somehow lead to heart disease.

-          I think this is what Julie said. Whenever professionals talk science to me, I zone out a little bit. But I took away Julie’s big picture message, which is: Not flossing can lead to total body meltdown later in life or else very expensive dental surgery, neither of which sounds very appealing.

4.               Diet – A recent study says diets don’t work. Any diet. Ever.

If you want to stay at a reasonable weight you have to commit to a healthy diet. All the time. So quit your juice cleanse. Stop abandoning carbs, and embrace healthy eating. All the time.  

You can have occasional cheats, but they have to be occasional. Don’t forsake any of the food groups. Eat them, but mindfully, in moderation. And also never drink your calories. This is one bit of Weight Watchers wisdom that will forever be tattooed on my brain.    

5.               Current Events -- If you want to have a reasonable clue about the world, you must:

-         Listen to NPR radio several times a week.

-         Watch one Sunday morning, political talk show.

A 2012 study from Fairleigh Dickinson University showed that folks who did these things were the best informed about world events.

I tell my college students to watch BBC News as well. It is supposed to feature the most neutral reportage around. And also the best accents!

It just took me maximum time to type up this list of bare minimum requirements. Make it worth my while and adopt one of these new habits today!  

Best LBD Ever: Little Black Dress Jewelry Organizer By Umbra

LBDs are a requirement for any closet. Or so fashion editors tell us. LBDs – or little black dresses – become not such a requirement when the last BTE (black tie event) attended can only be dimly recalled. That’s how far back in the mists of time it occurred.

This is the certainly the case for me. So I am surprised that my runaway favorite closet item is indeed a LBD.

I got this baby a few weeks ago, and it makes my organizing heart sing, just seeing it there in the closet. Because prior to its purchase, the jewelry situation was not so organized.

My necklaces sat, jumbled on a shelf, in an enormous pile. Earrings were scattered, hither and yon. None of it was worn very often, prompting one friend to declare me positively Amish in my approach to jewelry.

Not Amish. Just disorganized. But not anymore. Thanks to this amazing Little Black Dress from the Container Store. I can see everything. And now I wear it too.

 

In a recent magazine, one DIYer recommends making your own little black dress for your jewelry by getting some perforated cardboard and a couple of S hooks. I guess you could do this too, although it seems like the result might be more junky than chic.

Instead, get thee to the Container Store for your own LBD STAT. (Click this link to go to the Container Store website where you can learn more about the Little Black Dress Jewelry Organizer. It's available for $19.99.) 

Pop Art Manicures In 3 Easy Steps

Nail art is huge these days. My friend Shawna has actual nail art tools that she uses to whip up fantastic designs on manicures she gives her daughter.

Shawna is artistic and amazingly calm under pressure, even the worst kind, i.e. 5 year old-with-wet-nail-polish-bouncing-around-upholstery pressure.

I am not terribly artistic or amazingly calm under pressure. But I just read about a fancy manicure that even someone like me can do. Am pretty sure I’m going to nab “mom of the year” with this one, or at least “manicurist mom of the year”.

Here’s what you do for the coolest, pop art manicure ever:

1.      Paint nails a base shade of gray. Let them dry. (They've gotta be totally dry or else the ink from Step 2 won't adhere.)

2.    Bust out your Sharpie markers. (What house-with-kids doesn't have tons of these?) Make sure you get the thin point ones and choose 3 colors – like purple, green and red.

 

3.    Draw squiggly lines down the center of each nail.

 

Presto! Nail art as cool as Rihanna’s with nary a smudge or extra tool to lose. Ingenius! With a thin point Sharpie marker I could do all kinds of great manicures. I could do dog, rainbow, even Minion manicures. The sky’s the limit! (The 10 year old also tells me that cool polka dots can be created using the tip of a bobby pin dipped in polish.)

 

What if you don’t have daughters to experiment on? A package of these low tech manicure tools would make a rockin’ gift for any little girls in your life if you want to cement your cool auntie rep.

 

Happy manicures, guru girls!   

 

Life Wisdom From A Toast R Oven

 

Had one of those days yesterday, the kind that have you looking skyward and talking to the universe, asking if there’s a specific reason it’s kicking your a$$.

It was nothing big. Just a series of frustrating events, one right after the other. The straw that broke the camel’s back was the toast R oven. This was the task that finally led to me sitting on the stairs, crying.

I don’t believe in kitchen gadgets. So I have never owned a toast R oven. Until 3 weeks ago, when I bought one. Finally. Because the 10 year old loves the quesadillas my friend makes with her toast R oven. The 10 year old talks about them all the time. So I thought this might be a kitchen gadget I would actually use if it would produce food the 10 year old might actually eat.

So I bought it. And popped it out of the box and into the cupboard. We are in serious anti-clutter mode here at guru girl because our house is on the market. So, feeling proud of myself and my clutter busting ways, I popped the box the oven came in right into the recycling bin.

Only it turns out it wasn’t just the box that got recycled, but also all the accessories that make the toast R oven work, namely the toast R oven’s grill and tray. I was in such a rush to recycle the darn box that I missed these items nestled inside the box. And I didn’t discover the oversight until after recycling day.

Do you know how difficult it is to order a replacement grill and tray for a toast R oven?

First, you google it.

Then you write down the model number.

Then you type in the model number on the replacement part website.

Then the website tells you it’s never heard of your specific model. Despite the fact that you bought it 3 weeks ago. From Target. Not the back of some guy’s truck.

Then you call Black and Decker customer service to order the replacement parts. You listen to a very long message from the Black and Decker people whose recording tells you, at the end, they are closed on Sunday. But to check their website. The very website that knows nothing of your specific model or the accessories you seek.

Then your internet crashes, and you are this close to throwing your computer out the window and driving to the store where you will open a toast R oven box and shoplift the needed accessories.

Then you become so overwhelmed by the whole thing that you sit on the stairs and cry.

About a toast R oven. Really.

 So, why did it send me around the bend? And why do I think I’m not alone in this response?

I’m not saying this happens all the time to me -- or any of us -- but I think to many of the high-standards-having gals among us, it happens. Because we’re juggling, and we don’t like to drop stuff. But we do sometimes.

Because we’re human. Not octopuses. (Or is it octopi?) And there’s a lot of stuff to juggle. So sometimes we move faster than we should in order to keep it all in the air. And then, when stuff drops, instead of forgiving ourselves, we beat ourselves up.

Instead of it being a simple mistake, we make it a character flaw. Instead of the inner monologue sounding like, “Wow, by mistake I threw away the grill and the tray” it becomes “You are a careless flibbertyjibbet.” My worst critic wouldn’t say this about me. Why would I say it about myself?

I read a quote somewhere that I think is great and so applicable to this situation. The quote says something along the lines of “Every experience is valuable. It’s either a success or a learning opportunity.”

And it’s true. What if we viewed mistakes as learning opportunities, not failures? Because that’s what they are. I bet I’ll be pretty darn careful to check the entire box every time I buy something in the future. And maybe $29.95 is a pretty good price to pay for that kind of knowledge.

“Keep it kind” is a mantra at our house. It’s aimed at the Dynamic Duo in an effort to keep sisterly peace, but maybe I should apply it to myself, about myself, as well.

In the meantime, my fella – seeing how upset I was about the darn oven – snuck out to Target and bought me a new one. I was so moved by the gesture that it made me cry all over again.

Here’s to kindness to ourselves (and also kindness from husbands who rise to the occasion, despite never having suffered a household- appliance-induced crying session ever).

Photo credit: The new toaster oven, which was totally paid for, at Target. Guru Girl would never actually shoplift from Target or any other retail establishment. Check out the grill, tray and operating instructions stashed inside the oven. Score!

Keepin' It Fresh: Fenugreen Fresh Paper Fights Wiltage

I am an aspirational grocery shopper, that is I often buy the kind of food I wish I liked to eat. I conveniently forget my aversion to vegetables and happily load vast quantities of them into my cart.

The problem is later, when these vast quantities sit in my refrigerator, taunting me with their uneaten status. And the more days that go by, the more wilted the veggies become and the more unlikely I am to eat them.

It is positively maddening! But it sounds like I am not the only one with this dilemma. Because some fruit and veggie loving genius has come up with a solution. They’re called Fresh Paper, and you get them at Whole Foods. So you know they must be good if I’m going to the store I hate just to get these suckers. (A pack of 8 sheets of Fenugreen Fresh Paper goes for about $4.99.)

Fresh Paper will make your fruit and produce last twice as long. Just pop a piece of it under (or around) the food that you want to last. That’s it.

Fresh Paper preserves your produce and your healthy-food-loving self image. Because it gives you twice as long to man up and eat the damn things.

Effective, inexpensive, good for you. Like downloading the perfect song, one you can’t help but rock out to every time it comes on. Fresh Paper isn’t as catchy as that “Treasure” by Bruno Mars (how great is that song?), but it’ll help keep your bod lookin’ positively jewel-like.

Guys, A Gift That Gets You Out Of Trouble Immediately

Upon seeing this pillow, my first reaction was: awwww.

My second reaction? Who, in fact, actually buys it?

I love it, but clearly this pillow is not something one buys for oneself.

And my fella? He would not – in one billion years – be reading the kind of magazines or websites that feature this sort of thing. So it would never occur to him to buy this pillow for me as a gift.

If I bought it for him it would be the worst kind of present: a “me” gift, an item technically given to him, but really something I appreciate. Like a spousal gift of lingerie or a gym membership. We clever partners see through the “me” gift every time.

We never forget it. And we never stop bringing it up. For these reasons, the “me” gift is not worth it. Buy it for yourself and save yourself the headache.

So I am not getting my guy this pillow. Instead, I shall stick with technology. Specifically the telescope 6x zoom camera for i-phones. Portable and easy, it lets you take cool, zoomed in pictures with your i-phone.

My fella and the Dynamic Duo have not yet met a mac app they do not love beyond all reason.

 

Like this one (the infamous photo booth) that morphs their faces into weird shapes.

Similarly, love-beyond-all-reason is also my reaction when I see this pillow. You don’t want to see what the photo booth feature did to my love-beyond-all-reason face. It was not pretty, so I am sparing you the visual.

You’re welcome. For that and the above pillow recommendation too. (If you are a guru guy and reading this, bookmark this page so the next time you are in trouble with your partner, you can order it up for her. Her heart will melt immediately. And you will have another decorative pillow for your bed. Small price to pay, guru guy. Just order it. ) (Click this linkt o go to zazzle.com to view the pillow and order it, if necessary.)   

It's A Purse, It's A Charger, It's Genius!

The guru crew has been house hunting this summer. There’s nothing like a real life house hunt to cure a girl of her t.v. house hunt addiction.

I now can’t turn the channel fast enough when an episode of “House Hunters” comes on.

It’s the same thing for Zillow. This is such a handy app to have on your phone. It gives directions to the home that’s on sale and shows you shamelessly staged photos of it.

House porn, I’ve heard it called. The house porn is killing my phone. The darn phone has actually lost its juice entirely, right in the middle of a good neighborhood stalk. Grrr.

Short of stopping in and charging up at a friendly coffee shop, what’s a girl to do?

Buy a new purse, of course. (Like I needed an excuse!) I just read about a purse that will charge your phone while you’re on-the-go.

This feature would be so helpful while house stalking and on numerous, other occasions. Such as when your youngest zaps all phone energy by zapping too many angry birds, while waiting at the doctor’s office. Also helpful when you watch too many “Girls” episodes on your phone, while in line to sign your own girls up for summer camp. (Please let enriching summer camp be the answer to my girls never growing up and making choices like Lena Dunham and her pals.)

I know it’s not that simple, but here’s what is: the amethyst fabric clutch  everpurse. At $189 it’s spendy, but if it keeps you plugged in and your peeps happy, it’s worth some consideration, in a way that Neo-Gothic monstrosity from the 60s is not. (Click this link to learn more about the everpurse at everpurse.com.)

Here’s to keeping fully charged, in our phones, our lives and our house hunts, guru girls & guys.

P.S. Our house hunt yielded success. We’ve found great, new digs. Look for many a guru girl post about the trials and tribulations of the one life event more tumultuous than adolescence: moving!  

7 Forbidden Foods That Fill You Up & Won't Make You Fat*

*if eaten in moderation, only when you absolutely must, while attending parties, soccer tournaments or find yourself feeling nibblish while running about town  

 

There is a diet book at my dentist’s office. I am mesmerized by this book. It takes a common sense approach to eating and life by telling you what you should eat and the calorie bombs to completely avoid.

You might think this kind of guidance is a no-brainer and who would buy such a book. And you would be right. I can’t quite bring myself to buy the book because I know it would sit, unread on my nightstand.

I did, however, flip through to the eating on-the-go section. And I took copious notes. Which I have stashed in my wallet for easy reference. Because the guru crew is ramping up to soccer season, and that means there will be fast food establishments that are visited.

Following is a list of “good” fast food (good clearly being a relative term).

McDonald’s:

McDouble Burger: 390 calories

 

           Chick Filet:

Chicken Club: 410 calories

Chicken Strips: 405 calories

           Chipotle:

                   Crispy tacos: 535 calories

I also clipped an article from a parenting magazine that detailed the best party food to eat. This kind of info is great because it means you can swill margaritas, completely guilt free. A margarita is a total calorie bomb, but it’s one you can afford if you pass on the chips and guac at the bash and instead eat these:

-         Crudité: Binge on the veggie plate, not the pasta salad.

 

-         Cold Cuts: Turkey roll ups are the best for the fewest calories. Ham and roast beef ones are runners up.

  

-         Nuts: They’ve got a lotta fat but they’ll fill you up, and keep you from cruising the cookies.

Summertime fun shouldn’t bring food stress with it. Keep these simple food swaps in mind and indulge! (Click this link to go to amazon.com to learn more about the book "Eat This, Not That". I can't remember if this is the exact book at my dentist's office, but it contains similar information. It's available on kindle for around $9.