5 Steps To Master A Win-Win Attitude

“It’s not the load. It’s how you carry it.”

You know me and aphorisms. I love them almost as much as Thomas Jefferson did, and that’s saying a lot. Because that guy came up with so many it was almost like a language. (And you thought all I read were the “People” magazine recommends.)

Back to aphorisms… I love the one above. I don’t know who made it up. But I think about it regularly.

It means you can’t choose the load you carry in life, the responsibilities and chores you call your own. Mine include loads of laundry towering as high as the pyramids and sometimes stacks of student papers almost as tall.

I can’t choose these responsibilities, but I can choose my attitude about them. I can be miserable and martyr-like about having to do them, or I can be upbeat. Either way, the laundry and grading still have to get done.

One approach has a bigger cost. So here’s what experts say we should do to get that old “glass half full” bump in mood.

1.      Reframe the challenge. Instead of saying “I have to…”, say “I get to…”

A few years ago I read an essay written by a mom of a kiddo with special needs. She wrote about how her son isn’t invited to any birthday parties and how much that would mean to him, and her, if he was included in these childhood celebrations.

Wow. Perspective check. Since reading that, I’ve uttered not one complaint about driving the Dynamic Duo across town to various birthday parties. In fact, I was ashamed of myself for ever having these thoughts.

 

2.    Connect the act to your values. I value feeding my family healthy food. Grocery shopping is what gets us there. Without it the guru crew is hitting the golden arches for our 3 squares, and how does that make me feel?

 

3.    Break the activity down so it’s manageable. Instead of one enormous load of laundry a week, do it a few times.

 

4.     Make it fun. And delegate. If at all possible. At our house we now have weekly laundry folding parties. Yes, there was lots of complaining about this at first. Now, it’s just part of a much more fun folding routine. Because any chore that includes a 7 year running around with dozens of underpants flying from her head is a fun chore (though it might take longer and the clothes might not be folded quite as neatly).

 

5.     Be flexible. Upon occasion, deviate from the responsibility. Time off is important. And you can always run to Target for new underpants if your laundry vacation leaves you in dire straits. 

You know folks who have that happy vibe, seemingly all the time? You should be picturing Matthew McConaughey now. Shirt optional. They’ve mastered the above 5 steps. Or possibly they’re just having a whole lot of pharmaceutical fun.

 

Here at guru girl we keep our recommendations on the legal side. So I can only advocate trying the above 5 steps for a win-win attitude.

 

And you should buy this really cute sign to help you remember that in life, just like in high heel wearing, it’s all about the attitude. (Click this link to see the Best Made website where you can buy this sign for around $28.)