The Burn Through Your "To Do" List Workout

 

My a$$ is killing me. I blame this condition on yesterday’s snow day, which meant the Dynamic Duo stayed home from school, which meant guru girl stayed home from the gym. Because the only thing more painful than a gym workout is a gym workout with the Dynamic Duo in tow, fighting over the ipad and asking how much longer it’s going to be.

So I did a home workout, only it’s been so long since I’ve done a home workout that I couldn’t find my Jillian Michaels workout DVD, which truth be told I’ve probably hidden on purpose. Because that workout is a killer, and I like my workouts on the light, “look at her glow” side, not the perspire-buckets-and-shred-your-abs side.

Instead I did a workout that I tore from the pages of “Self” magazine months ago. It had two sections, one titled “burn” and the other titled “firm”. I did both.

This was foolish. I don’t think I’m going to be doing any more burning or firming for a really long time. That’s how much pain I’m in. So, in the end, this crazy workout will probably make me gain weight. My fella is a glass-half-full type, and he says this aftermath I’m suffering means the workout really worked.  

The things I liked about this workout were:

a)   it’s speedy, under 40 minutes

 b) it’s not complicated to follow, unlike some of those workouts where you see the picture of the girl doing it and are totally mystified

 c) it requires no other gear

So really it’s a “no excuses” kind of workout. This is exactly the kind I myself need. So give it a try. Maybe don’t do the “burning” and “firming” steps on the same day. And perhaps don’t kick with quite as much gusto as I did. Then maybe you will be able to move pain-free the next day.

If not, and you suffer the same fate as me, there is good news. It qualifies you to moan and groan and beseech your fella to do stuff for you since rising from a sitting position is most painful. So far today my fella has gotten me coffee, let out the dog and done the entire morning routine with the Dynamic Duo. So, upon further reflection, this may be the best kind of workout, one that burns calories and shortens your to-do list. (Although you gotta be careful with the kvetching, I can see how it’s also shortening my fella’s patience.)

 

Here’s to heavenly hamstrings, guru girls  & guys!

Here’s a summary of the workout, which is no longer available on self.com/fitness. (But they've got lots of other ones posted.)

Do each move for 30 seconds. Then rest 30 seconds. Then add the next move. (This means you’re going to do move 1 for a total of 5 times.) A full explanation of “stacking” is at end of this post.

 

“Burn” category:

Move 1: Jog in place for 30 seconds.

Move 2: Do side to side lunges, with opposite hand crossing in front of body and touching ground.

Move 3: Do a kicking handstand. (With hands planted on ground, kick your feet in air as high as you can.)

Move 4: Do the kicking boxer move. Kick your leg out and punch your arm out at same time. Alternate sides.

Move 5: Do the jumping plank move. Get on ground in push up position. Bring feet up to your hands and leap into the air. Go back into original plank position and repeat.

“Firm” category:

Move 1: Squats.

Move 2: Flying airplane move. Lay on the floor on your stomach. Raise hands and legs off floor. Hold for 1 count. Repeat.

Move 3: Ab-alicious. Lie faceup on floor. Hands behind head like you’ll do a situp. Both legs are in air. Lower leg until it’s just above floor. Return to start. Alternate legs.

Move 4: Push up. Either old-school, full push up or modified on-your-knee type push up.  

Here’s how stacking works:

Do Move 1.

Rest.

Do Move 1 and 2.

Rest.

Do Move 1, 2, 3.

Rest.

Do Move 1,2,3,4,5.

Rest. (And throw up, if necessary.)