Urban Myths & Guard Alaska Bear Spray

 

Urban myths are a scourge of the earth, particularly for people like me who believe every single one of them and act on the information. I get a flu shot every year. I’m pretty sure the flu shot is an urban myth. Because every other year I get the damn flu.

E-mail is another fantastic source of urban myth. So recently when I got a warning e-mail from my dad I didn’t even want to go there. My dad got it from his friend and passed it along to me. In my experience the e-mail exchanges between my dad and his retired buddies consist almost entirely of forwarded dirty jokes, so I seldom click on the links. But this time I did.

The e-mail was a warning about the latest ploys urban gangs are using to victimize us. The message said that if you’re driving on a highway at night and someone throws a bunch of eggs at your windshield you should not turn on your windshield wipers.

Because this will create an obscuring, milky residue all over your windshield. You’ll have to pull over then because you won’t be able to see out your windshield to drive. That’s when the gang will nab you. 

Then the message gave a second warning: if you’re driving down a remote road and you see an infant car seat on the side of the road, you shouldn’t pull over to check it out. This is because the car seat is a ruse that gangs use to get drivers – usually trusting women – out of their car. Once you’re out of your car and inspecting the car seat, you’ll see there’s no baby in it. But by then, it will be too late. The gang members who placed it there -- and have been hiding behind a nearby tree -- will have nabbed you.

I think these warnings are urban myths. But you never know. I used to think rumors of gang activity here in idyllic Colorado were greatly exaggerated too. Then I taught a professional speaking class at the community college and listened to a student give an absolutely riveting, informative speech about how gangs work. Wow. Talk about eye-opening and tricky to grade.

Here’s what it boils down to: There’s bad stuff out there. It gets exaggerated by media and the internet, but it’s out there. You need to be safe. Let’s not perpetuate a culture of fear, but let’s also arm ourselves with a healthy dose of awareness and bear spray.

I am a big fan of bear spray. It has none of the murky legal, ethical and practical considerations of gun ownership. You can order up some on amazon, stash it in your purse and ignore the ominous warning e-mails from your dad.

Keep a good head on your shoulders, some Guard Alaska in your bag and go on with your day, guru girls and guys!(Click on this amazon link to find out more about Guard Alaska Bear spray, available for around $31.)